COVID-19 – what are you teaching us?

As I move through this crisis with all of you I am speechless and horrified all at the same time. I find myself moving into a state of immobilization and wanting to flee and then realizing that anywhere I run to, the crisis is still there. It reminds me of a saying “everywhere I go…

What the Heck is Poly Vagal?

Warning- for some people this will be difficult content to digest. Please consider a grounding exercise such as a mindfulness exercise or using temperature to the ground after you have read this article. Dr. Stephen Porges a researcher and scientist emphasizes the importance of bidirectional neurofeedback between body and brain. Porges emphasizes the importance of…

Adaptive Skills Learned in Childhood

What are the skills that you learned in your childhood that helped you meet your needs? For example, did you become the class clown to get attention from your caregiver? When people laughed at you did you feel special? Do you remember finally getting the attention that you deserved? Some children adapt to their family…

The Founder of EMDR Has Died – RIP Francine Shapiro

The Great Francine Shapiro has died. She has changed the lives of hundreds of thousands of people and worked to make the world a better place. I have had the great honour of witnessing the power of EMDR and how it continues to help so many people. May the EMDR community continue to pass on…

Making Sense of Childhood Trauma

Coming Soon… Online Video Modules;  “Making Sense of Childhood Trauma.” For anyone who wishes to learn about trauma and master emotions or experience them without shutting down. For anyone who wants to be a better parent, partner, or friend. For anyone who wants to be the best version of themselves. For anyone who wants to achieve a life…

Top Three Myths About PTSD

PTSD is a Disorder
FACT Post Trauma is an injury not a disorder
PTSD is everywhere.
FACT There is a greater understanding and awareness about trauma now.
PTSD is untreatable
FACT
EMDR and Exposure therapies work

What is Dissociation?

Dissociation is a phenomena or defence mechanism designed to protect us from threat. It’s a state that one can move into when they sense danger. Sometimes when a person is in a dangerous or threatening situation a person will freeze kind of like a deer in headlights. Once the threat has past so does the freeze response.

Why Do We Get Into Dysfunctional Relationships That Mirror Our Childhood?

Children idealize their dysfunctional caregivers in various ways. They do this by creating a fantasy of who their caregivers are. They literally tell themselves lies, make up stories in their mind about how wonderful their caretakers are. They exaggerate their caretaker’s strengths to minimize the deficits or abuse as a way to survive the dysfunctional system. They tell stories to themselves about how wonderful their father, mother or caregivers are so that they can be sure to omit the abuse adapt and carry on.

Are You Living The Life You Were Programmed To Live Or The Life You Were Born To Live?

Did you grow up in a childhood where you spent the majority of your time taking care of your caregiver(s) needs? Instead of your parents meeting your needs, you found yourself sacrificing your needs to take care of your parents?  Your parents were self-involved, more worried about their own needs and wants that you were neglected or ignored? This kind of parenting is known as narcissistic parenting.